Escaping from Hell
by katerinaaqu
Summary: Mello is desperate and presses the button of the bomb... The bulding sets on fire... He was prepared for the pain...but no one could prepare him for this! And after all it's over...he is left alone...Fortunately Matt is there to help him... Story from Mello's POV please review!


I heard the police officers of Japanese Task Force rushing in the room… Everything…was over… I had lost everything! It was all or nothing! I pressed the button…and the huge explosion burst the entire hideout into flames…burning everything in it…me included! The fire was burst onto me as well! The very moment the fire touched my body the pain was unbearable! I started to scream my lungs out and waving my arms all around as if I was some kind of maniac! I was prepared to be hurt…I knew that it would hurt by the very moment I pushed that button! But, all hells, I was never prepared for this! I was never prepared for so much angst…so much agony and pain… My clothes were on fire and I was screaming like crazy! Waving my arms like a madman! My mind went blank and I didn't care weather the others, if they were still alive, would hear me! I am surprised that indeed no one had heard me! I was agonizing as the flames were burning my body… The smell of burning flesh was all around and I knew…I knew it was mine! I was the one burning! I was the one! I was! I knew the feeling! It was panic! I was getting panicked! The flames were licking my body and it hurt!

It damn hurt!

A hissing sound of the flesh that was scorching was buzzing in my ears! The small remaining of the logical part in my mind started to protest…to tell me to remember what I have learnt since I was a kid…to fall to the ground and roll…so the fire would go out…but fall where?! The floor was also on fire! The walls were on fire! I was on fire! I was screaming my lungs out trying to cover my face…try to stop that burning fire of hell that was scorching me! My eyes were open wide and my screams seemed to come out of my mouth as if I didn't need to take a breath anymore! As if I could! The smoke was entering my lungs along with the smell of m own burning flesh! I was feeling my lungs burning as if I was breathing in the fire itself! My eyes were almost blind by all the firelight! The flame tongues were licking my skin…my flesh…I had the impression that it would scorch my muscles and bone! I had lost everything…everything was over…

But no!

I wasn't dead yet! They wouldn't win! No! They wouldn't win! I don't know how, but obviously my surviving instincts took over…and I found myself staggering through the building that was burning down… I was staggering…that's all I can remember…supporting myself against the walls… Even that, was burning my hands! The stone on the destroyed walls was burning…but I needed something to hold on to! Or I would fall to the ground and I knew…that I would never get up again! And I wanted to live! I didn't care how! I would crawl out if I had to! I would escape alive even if the fire burnt my body to the bone! My clothes were all burnt on my body…and my eyes were blurry…and I finally…saw a small ray… It was an exit! An exit! I felt my heart filled with joy as if I had seen a small piece of heaven inside the depths of hell… I staggered and got out…out in fresh air! My body was burning all over…and I could see the smoke coming over it… I was reeking burnt flesh and smoke…but I was alive…yes…I was alive…

* * *

I raised my arms in the air…even if it hurt and burnt like I wanted to grab the sky in my embrace…and then it was when I released the loudest cry yet! It wasn't the agonizing screams of pain and panic I had screamed before! It was an animalistic growl of anger…pain…sadness…desperation… Maybe all the feelings I ever had in my life! But I was alive! I was alive…

The next thing I realized was that I was staggering in the open road… My hideout was far away from any house anyway… And I was staggering… My whole body was in pain…every single part of me was feeling like burning… I would try to cover my burnings but…every move I made, made me feel as though someone was rubbing my burnt flesh with a hard sponge… My ears were still buzzing from the sounds of fire…the building burning down…my own flesh that was scorching… My eyes were still blurry by the firelight and I was seeing everything through a white mist…as if I was drunk or anything… My shoes had melted during the fire…so I was walking barefoot…and my clothes were nearly absolutely destroyed on my body… Speaking of which…my body seemed to be unwilling to move… Every time I would try to make a proper move…it would burn me… I was feeling a thick liquid running all over my body and I could feel that it wasn't my sweat… It was coming from my burnings…and it had started to reek as well! I was wincing in every step I was taking…walking completely stiff…as if I was some kind of wooden doll…or a zombie! I would support myself against walls at times…or fences or something… I had to find a way to go back!

I damn had to!

My breathing was heavy and was coming out in pants…gasping like a dying animal… Oh, yes that moment I wasn't even a human… I was just a being that was agonizing desperately to be kept alive! If I weren't in such a state…I would even laugh at myself for allowing myself fall to this level. But I had no choice… It was that…or being captured…or killed… And how would I catch Kira? How would I beat Near?

After some more steps my strength betrayed me and I fell to the ground… My mind was dizzy…my head was spinning…I was no longer feeling the pain of my wounds… I was losing consciousness… I looked up desperately and the last thing I remember seeing was…a human figure above my head…and then darkness…

* * *

I don't know how long I was unconscious but what I am sure about is that I am starting regaining my senses slowly and steadily… I start opening my eyes almost at a snail's speed. My eyesight is still kind of blurry but I am glad to see that it has somehow improved. As I take a breath I wince in pain feeling my body burning. My first reaction after regaining consciousness, flashing for barely a single moment, is panic! I am still there! I must go away! I must survive! However right after that, the logical part of my mind takes over once again as I remember… I had indeed escaped! I can feel my head pretty comfortable on a soft pillow…and a soft blanket covering my body… But my next observation is that my eyesight is a bit strange…my eye is… is… I raise my hand, despite the feeling of thousands needles piercing my burnt flesh, and I touch my eye… It is wrapped! In what? Bandages? Then I can also sense that the rest of my body is inflexible. It is also wrapped in bandages! How bad was I? Now I am starting to feel like one of those mummies I had seen in movies when I was a child, back in Wammy's House.

For the first time I take a look around. I am in a bed…in a small room. Nothing special is in here. It is a room 2x3 that has a bed, a small night table and something like a desk or something on the other side. Before the bed there is a covered, rectangular object. Some kind of mirror frame, I presume, but I don't really care to find out… But where am I? Who has brought me here?

Suddenly the slight smell of English smoke reaches my nostrils and I hear a familiar voice to me…

"I see you're awake, dude…"

I turn my head to the direction of the smell and the voice, towards the right, and I see a young man sitting on a chair close to the bed.

It is a man with rich, yet short brunette hair, having his huge yellow goggles on his head, wearing colorful clothes. I don't need to guess who it is!

"Matt…" I manage to whisper hoarsely.

Matt, my old friend almost like brother to me, smiles his well-known smile while having the cigarette in his mouth.

"You had me worried, dude! It was about time for you to wake up"

How bad was I? I know…and I was prepared that I would get hurt and certainly that I would get burnings and scars but…how bad was I?

"Bring me a mirror!" I say harshly

"It's not a good idea dude…"

"Just bring me a freaking mirror!"

Matt sighs and stands up…and goes straight to the covered mirror frame. Why had he covered it? How bad was I? That bad? Matt pulls down the cover…and I see my reflection… All I can do is gasp. Is that really me? The left side of my face is covered in bandages…the same goes for my upper body… I keep looking at my reflection as if in a daze…I still can't believe what I am seeing… I was never prepared for something like this…right…? Right…?

I slowly get out of bed, even though needles are piercing my burnt flesh, and I slowly walk there… God! I am helpless, but I can't help myself! I walk to the mirror and I touch my reflection…there is no doubt…it is me! But I need to see! What damage did the fire cause to me? I start unwrapping the bandages ignoring the pain.

"No! No dude…don't remove your bandages…you shouldn't…"

But I am paying no mind to his advice. Soon the bandages fall to the floor around my feet with a soft "whoosh" and I look myself! What I see makes me gasp once again! Yes I was prepared to see scars…to see something…unpleasant but no one could have prepared me for this! The half of my face is burnt really badly! The same goes for my upper body where I can see huge burnings and scars! My epidermis is twisted and now from my burnings a disgusting liquid is coming out! So I am a monster! In the end…I…

I tighten my fingers in fists and I touch my fist against the cold, glass surface of the mirror! Damn that fire! Damn Near! Damn Kira! Dammit all! Dammit all! Not for destroying my looks but because of everything that led me to all this! Dammit all to all hells that might exist! No! What do they know about hell? Only someone who gets burnt can truly understand what hell feels like! Only when you have felt your flesh being burnt…melting by fire…only then you can have the right to talk about hell!

"Come on dude…come on…" I hear Matt's comforting voice as he comes to me and tries to lead me to bed again…

"It's time to change your bandages now… Come on…don't be like that…"

His voice is indeed comforting… If it weren't him… I refuse to look at the mirror again! I am not ready yet! I don't think I want to look at it again! Matt helps me back on the bed and then bents down to pick some kind of ointment for my burnings.

"This might sting a little" he warns me but I simply don't care!

He starts putting the ointment on my burnings! Sometimes I wince in pain, since I can't help myself…

"How did you find me?" I finally ask while he is taking care of my burns.

"It was difficult! Dude, you sure know how to hide!" he says jokingly to lighten the atmosphere a little.

He always did that as long as I remember myself!

"Anyway I followed some traces and also I heard that the police was going to attack a warehouse where the mafia was and…well I took a good guess that you would be there. I took the car and I drove to the area when I heard a loud explosion! Man what you did was reckless!"

"Did you see the ruins? Did you find any other bodies?"

"One or two…they were all destroyed by the fire but…"

"I am not asking you that!" I interrupt him impatiently, "Did you find any bodies that would prove they belonged to a policeman? Anything?"

I know that I sound desperate and I curse myself for my weakness inside my head but I need to know! Matt looks at me and shakes his head…

"No, pal. Sorry I didn't…"

I clench my teeth.

"Damn!" I mutter.

I had failed. In the end they got the Notebook! They got my only weapon. They got my only team! They got everything! I got burnt for nothing! Matt probably notices my frustration and finishes with my bandages softly and touches my shoulder.

"Talk ta me man… What happened back then? What's this all about anyway?"

I don't know why but when I look at him deeply in his eyes…I know I can trust him… So I speak. I tell him everything. I tell him everything about L's death…about the message he left to me and Near…about the fact that L hadn't chosen his heir between us two and so we were supposed to work together…I tell him about the fact that I left from Wammy's House to investigate Kira Case on my own…I tell him about me finding the mafia and becoming their leader…I tell him everything about my investigation…and finally…I tell him everything about the Death Note…about the Shinigami, the Gods of Death, that possess the Notebooks and what they are capable of doing…I tell him everything… While I am talking, Matt is smoking his cigarettes as usually and sometimes he is shaking his head in understanding. He doesn't interrupt me. He never did in the past, so he doesn't now either. And I can see it in his eyes that he believes me. Obviously he is smart enough to understand that I haven't simply threw myself in the fire for some crazy fairy tale if I didn't have the proofs for what I was saying…

When I finish my narration, Matt remains silent for a little before rubbing his chin with his finger in deep thought.

"So let me get this straight… Kira is using one of these Notebooks of Death that all it takes is to write some guy's name in it and that guy actually dies? And behind him there is some "god of death" that can make deals with him… And now Japanese Task Force has one of them…the one you had taken from them…?"

I simply nod my head. There is no need for me to repeat myself now. After all Matt is really smart and he seems to have understood everything. He was always the third best in Wammy's House after me. However he had something different than me…he always did… He never actually wished to surpass me…just the opposite… He was always by my side and sometimes we were helping each other. To tell the truth Matt was and is the only person in the world that I would actually call…"friend"…

"But you're really busted man…" he comments.

I know he is right. Right now I have nothing. No clues, no evidence, no leads…I have nothing! And now I don't even have partners or pawns to continue my "game" with Near. And not only that I am totally unable to move around for a little while at least till my burnings stop stinging that much! I growl a little. Matt hears me.

"Come on, pal. Don't be like that. Nothing is lost yet. Since the 'big guys' have our clues then the only thing we can do is watching them till we get somethin'!"

I can't help but gasp a little and look up at him.

"Matt…what are you…"

"Isn't it obvious? Did ya think that I would leave ya alone after searching all America ta find ya? Gimme a break!" he smiles to me.

I simply cannot explain my feelings right now. I am grateful to him beyond explanation! He knows that it is dangerous! He knows that his life might be at stake and he knows that we will be in disadvantage. He has nothing to do with my rivary with Near and still…he wants to help me!

"Matt…" I whisper…

"I might not be a super genius like you two guys, but I am the best in watching and searching around, plus I have da car so it can be helpful don't ya think?"

For the first time in my life I am truly unable to speak… Matt stands up throwing the cigarette butt to the floor and stepping over it.

"Well then…ya get some rest while I am going to catch something for us ta eat. Care for a burger?"

"Matt…why are you helping me?" my voice stops him.

Matt turns around and looks at me.

"Why you said?" he smiles one of his warm smiles, "Because you're my buddy, dude. No matter what happens I was by your side remember?"

"But why? You have nothing to do with the case or mine and Near's rivalry…"

"Well that might be true but…"

He stops to put another cigarette in his mouth and light it.

"…But still it was fun for me watching ya two competing each other. I was always one step behind and I was enjoying watching ya two… We used to be buddies but I never was really…close to him to favor him…I don't despise the guy…it is just I do not adore him either…And right now…it is a bit unfair for Near to have all the SPK by his side while ya all alone don't ya think?"

He blows some smoke.

"If you're gonna catch Kira and beat Near…you will do it with my help!"

He smiles again to me…and again I have lost my words…

"Matt…"

"We're gonna beat Near and we're gonna catch Kira…"

Stretches his hand to me.

"…But we're gonna do it together…"

I look at him then at his hand and then back at him. Suddenly I smile and shake his hand with a nod.

"Right!" I say

Mat smiles again and lets go of my hand.

"Now ya better rest if you wanna these wounds to heal anytime soon! And when that happens…we will go to find the evidence! Just tell me and I'll be there for ya pal!"

I sit there smiling gratefully and then I scoff.

"Man! We're getting emotional aren't we?" Matt reads my thoughts, "This is so unlike us!"

"Yeah…" I admit, "Don't tell anyone!"

He chuckles and puts his sleeveless jacket on.

"Alright! I am gonna pick something for us ta eat now. I'm starving!"

He starts walking towards the door and then stops to look over his shoulder and smile a playful smile to me.

"Ya know…you look more handsome with those scars! It makes ya look tough!" teases me.

I scoff again. He always knows how to cheer me up!

"Whatever…" I say

He simply chuckles and walks out of the room…

* * *

So here I am…I am sitting on the bed wrapped in bandages… My body is burnt…it is full with scars…and I know these scars will never fade away… However now I would care less… I would care less if the scars would leave or not…I would care less for the others took the Notebook…I would care less about anything! I found hope again! I found my purpose again! And for the first time in years I will truly have a true ally by my side. Now I feel a fool for even feeling despair a few moments ago… I feel like a fool that I lost my fighting spirit! Right now I am back to my old self again! Thanks to Matt I am now more ready than ever to face Near, Kira, the Shinigami or everything else that will pop out in my way! And now I am back! It is not just the Notebook I am after… I wanna eliminate my competition! I will be the best! I don't care what it takes… I'll beat Near by any means necessary! No matter what I'll have to do…I'll get Kira before Near! I want Kira's head…and I'll kill everyone who gets in my way! I will be number one!

I will!

But…right now I am not alone! That's right, Near! I am not alone anymore! Matt is by my side! And I know that he will remain by my side no matter what! I saw it in his eyes that he doesn't care how dangerous this mission is! Our goal is the same now! So Near you better watch out! And you, Kira! You too! Cause we're coming for you! I escaped from hell! And I am alive…

Yes…I'm alive…

* * *

**Here is a one-shot I have written about Mello by the time he presses the button of that bomb till the moment he is saved. In the manga it mentions that mo medical records of him existed to none of the hospitals around but that made me thing that it would be impossible for him with so many burnings to have gone far away or healed by himself! That's why this came to my mind!**

**Matt saved him! ;P**

**And probably that was the reason Matt appears to Death Note storyline after that! Probably (I thought) Matt took care of him! So here is the story from Mello's point of view! I hope that I got his feelings well...**

**It is not yaoi in general but for the Mello x Matt fans it can also be considered as shonnen ai! ^^ I leave that to your imagination! Your choice!**

**Piching up theme songs during this one I would choose:**

**_Mello presses the button: _**Semblance of Dualism _** (till 0:40)**_

_**Mello on fire: **_Death Note theme

_**Mello walking: **_Low of Solipsism

_**Mello's scars:** _Kyrie

**Mello's final cry when he gets out of the flaming building was inspired by the scene from "V for Vendetta" where the person from room V escapes and screams in the fire... Anyway! I hope you liked it!**

**Please review me! Enjoy!**


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